a thief in the night!

They say "Death comes quietly like a thief in the night." Last night, i had my afternoon shift and that's from 3pm til 11:00pm. When i arrived at the Pedia ward, there were only two patients admitted on our care. There were 3 of us nurse volunteers and 1 head nurse. Because of that my senior nurse asked me to help the medical ward since they had 14 patients to care for and 2 of which are on the critical watch. I didn't want to be assigned there because i have not yet been oriented there and i didn't know each patient's case. Even though i hated to be assigned there but as a dutiful nurse i had to do what i was told to do because im a nurse and my service was needed. I had to help with the medications. One of our critical list was a 26 yr old male, who was admitted for alcohol intoxication. He had seizures and we had to keep an eye on him every now and then. I have never seen such case in my entire student life and i was kind of shock at what i saw. I never expect to be that worse. Poor guy, i said to myself but what the heck had he done? He's struggling from his life. So anyway, the night went smoothly until the health attendant came to the station reporting to us that a patient whose family named Sultones had a fall as he was on his way to the comfort room and he could not be awaken. His Blood pressure according to the health attendant before the fall was 80/50. Then the patient's watcher came crying to us and asking us for help. So we got there and assisted the patient back to his bed. We thought he was fine. So we went back to the station but a relative of the patient came again asking for help. So i went to look for the attendant coz she had the BP apparatus and the Stethoscope. So unfortunate that this hospital has only one BP apparatus for each station. I went to the male ward and found the head nurse and so i reported to her what happened. She then asked me to change the tubing set of the patient with catapres side drip while she checks on Sultones. After changing the tubing set, when i got out from the female ward there were already commotion at the male ward where nurses and health attendant came running here and there. The doctor was already doing CPR. The emergency supplies had to be pulled out from other stations coz the equipment of the emergency kit are not complete. We had to get ambu bag from other station, and i had to run to the female ward to get the extension wire for the ECG. We had to get gloves from the ER and there was no Oxygen tank on standby and we had to call for the attendant to supply one. I didn't know what to do. My mind was like floating or drifting to some place. It' s like i never wanted to be there and to be into that situation. After all efforts were made, the doctor pronounced him dead. I was numbed and i didn't know how i should feel. So we quietly gather all the equipments and left the room while i could hear the gentle sobbing of the patient's relative. He wasn't on our critical lists. Infact he was to be discharged today. We did not expect he'd go. He went as quietly into the night. He wasn't struggling nor was he in pain. He just closed his eyes and left. When i got home, i was exhausted but i could not sleep. My thoughts were recounting the events that happened during my shift. What a night it has been for a volunteer nurse like me.